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Started by FleurDuMal on Jan 7, 2018 5:42:05 PM
Thread to deal with characters in books who annoy the fuck out of you.

We’ve all been there; someone in a book is just so bloody annoying that you want to slap them.

List them here. With reasons.

HelenDamnation - 07 Jan 2018 17:44:12 (#1 of 151)

Almost all characters in Virginia Woolf's complete works.

Because they are either like her, or cardboard cutouts. Empathy my arse.

FleurDuMal - 07 Jan 2018 17:46:09 (#2 of 151)

Heathcliff and Cathy: pair of fucking drama queens.

I’d like to knock their heads together.

Tadagee - 07 Jan 2018 17:48:15 (#3 of 151)

Not a book but...


thisonehasalittlehat - 07 Jan 2018 17:48:54 (#4 of 151)

The whinging is very much the best bit.

Delighted_User - 07 Jan 2018 17:50:58 (#5 of 151)

Holden Caulfield. You rant about your hatred for someone's cheap luggage, and you have the nerve to call others phonies?

TinyMcOtter - 07 Jan 2018 18:02:19 (#6 of 151)

Julian from the Famous Five was a stuck up git.

moto748 - 07 Jan 2018 18:45:58 (#7 of 151)

Yes to #5 and #6!

JennyRad - 07 Jan 2018 18:48:03 (#8 of 151)

That ghastly Lockwood in Wuthering Heights is worse than Heathcliff and Cathy.

FleurDuMal - 07 Jan 2018 19:10:15 (#9 of 151)

Mr Woodhouse in Emma was a whinging, attention-seeking git.

Pentecost - 07 Jan 2018 19:29:34 (#10 of 151)

Billie Fucking Bunter.

FGBFGB - 07 Jan 2018 19:48:13 (#11 of 151)

Bathsheba Everdene. A right madam.

FGBFGB - 07 Jan 2018 19:48:54 (#12 of 151)

Bertie Wooster's Aunt Agatha was a bit of a one, too.

FleurDuMal - 07 Jan 2018 19:50:31 (#13 of 151)

That female character in Wooster, who thought that the stars were God’s daisy chain was a right pain in the arse, too.

JennyRad - 07 Jan 2018 19:50:41 (#14 of 151)

Bertie Wooster's Aunt Agatha was a bit of a one, too.

At least she's meant to be.

Now, Fitz, in Robin Hobb's Assassins and Fool trilogies, he's not meant to be annoying, and I love the books, but he really is a pissing pain in the arse.

thismorning - 07 Jan 2018 19:50:43 (#15 of 151)

HC did not as I read the book CITR rant about someone's cheap luggage. What he did was feel depressed because his luggage was better than the boy's luggage who he roomed with at that school. Holden was depressed by the world he lived in. By his young brother's death from cancer. By his older brother who was a brilliant writer selling out to Hollywood. By the "fuck you" someone wrote on a school wall his little sister attended. His main problem was religious callowness. He wanted some unobtainable "utopia". He has a sort messianic egotism to tell you the truth. I always wanted to hand him a copy of the Confessions of that Catholic guy Saint Agustibus or summut. In a way I think HC was a sort of Agustus if you remember that part in the Confessions where he was all gloomy and all about the world and then he heard a young boy singing "tolle lege", so he started to study the scriptures and everything snapped into place, but HC had a very weak insight into the things of God and all. It was not his fault exactly. He was like just about everyone else. Still he was a very bright boy and sometimes I just you know ruin the book by introducing him to the Confessions and all. But of course even if he read it he would get it all wrong somehow. There would be some egg salad on one of the pages or something and that would drive his crazy and he would say thatz the trouble someone is always smearing egg salad on everything.

FGBFGB - 07 Jan 2018 19:55:03 (#16 of 151)

who thought that the stars were God’s daisy chain was a right pain in the arse, too.

Madeleine Bassett.

A bit less awful than Honoria Glossop, who wanted Bertie to read her poetry, and who has a laugh like the Scotch Express.

mingmong - 07 Jan 2018 19:58:54 (#17 of 151)

Flora Post of Cold Comfort Farm farm fame just needs to STFU and stop assuming her bossy, bourgeois suburban southern English value-system is necessarily what everyone else wants or needs

Brilliant book though. And much of the comedy would be lost if La Poste wasn't like that

JennyRad - 07 Jan 2018 19:59:33 (#18 of 151)

Random fact: Kevin Warwick, once famous as the Cyborg Professor, claims to have named his daughter Madeleine after Madeleine Bassett. I nearly spat wine all over him when I heard this.

Antimatter - 07 Jan 2018 19:59:33 (#19 of 151)

Mrs Tiggywinkle. Just because you are a girl it does not mean that you have to do the laundry.

FGBFGB - 07 Jan 2018 19:59:38 (#20 of 151)

Was not that the point? An Emma satire? (to mingmong)

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