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Started by Agaliarept on 07-Dec-2017 10:42:03
50 Shades of Grey to Brokeback Mountain: are these really the most boring films ever?

The British public, wrong as they are about everything, have just outdone themselves. A survey has been published – a survey to promote a new type of washing machine, but still – listing the 20 most boring films of all time. And, lord, it is a mess. Let’s begin by showing you which films the public chose:

https://www.theguardian.com/film/filmblog/2017/dec
/07/most-boring-films-ever-fifty-shades-of-grey-brokeback-mountain

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Agaliarept - 07 Dec 2017 10:42:41 (#2 of 104)

1. 50 Shades of Grey

2. The Blair Witch Project

3. Star Wars Episode I: The Phantom Menace

4. Brokeback Mountain

5. Transformers

6. The Postman

7. The Artist

8. Australia

9. Vanilla Sky

10. Seven Years in Tibet

11. Batman and Robin

12. 2001: A Space Odyssey

13. The Matrix Revolutions

14. Showgirls

15. Far and Away

16. The Tree of Life

17. Noah

18. Meet Joe Black

19. Lincoln

20. Cleopatra

HorstVogel - 07 Dec 2017 10:43:54 (#3 of 104)

I think I have only seen 4 of them, not including Batman and Robin as I haven't been able to finish seeing that one.

YuleCunt - 07 Dec 2017 10:49:41 (#4 of 104)

Good old the general public. They know nothing and they can't parse survey questions correctly. Who would ask them about anything?

YuleCunt - 07 Dec 2017 10:50:34 (#5 of 104)

There are some interesting choices in there though. The Tree Of Life? Surely only three people saw that.

champagnerocker - 07 Dec 2017 10:50:47 (#6 of 104)

I've seen the start of Australia and the Matrix Revolutions and not got to the end because they were so tedious.

I felt like I deserved a medal after getting through all of Cleopatra, because the last three hours were a struggle to stay awake.

MoominChristmasMadness - 07 Dec 2017 10:53:06 (#7 of 104)

I've only seen two, three and four. Oh and ten. That one is certainly quite annoying. I didn't find TBWP boring but absolutely terrifying and wouldn't rush to see it again. Might have seen that Matrix film - certainly one of them was very dull indeed.

JohnIlly - 07 Dec 2017 10:55:32 (#8 of 104)

In that list I have only seen 2001 so would have placed it a LOT higher. It probably comes top in a list of films which loads of people find boring but also loads find great.

Agaliarept - 07 Dec 2017 10:57:01 (#9 of 104)

I think I have only seen 4 of them

Yep, 2,3,4,14,18 and 19 here. I wouldn't have called any of them boring. Lincoln was set a a slower pace but that didn't make it boring.

thisonehasalittlehat - 07 Dec 2017 10:58:54 (#10 of 104)

I've seen:

2. Blair Witch. This was a good microbudget film, but I'd imagine that the scares it had have long since gone.

3. Star wars I. Which I did not like. It was not so much boring as very static.

5. Transformers. Which I did not like. Again, not so much boring as just very by-the-numbers.

9. Vanilla Sky. This is a good film and people are stupid.

12. 2001. This is a good film and people are stupid and also philistines.

13. The Matrix revolutions: well what did you expect after the second one?#

17. Noah, a bunch of silly fun.

18. Meet joe black. I did find this surprisingly dull.

19. Lincoln. I've seen the one with the vampires which is aces and skills.

thisonehasalittlehat - 07 Dec 2017 10:59:47 (#11 of 104)

I've probably seen a few of the others but can't recall. There's a whole bunch of really boring films that nobody has seen so don't make these lists. Many of these films are just tedious rather than boring, a few are disappointing sequels, and a few probably just deliver poorly on raised expectations.

Moschops - 07 Dec 2017 11:02:31 (#12 of 104)

Another great Stuart Heritage piece

HorstVogel - 07 Dec 2017 11:15:51 (#13 of 104)

In that list I have only seen 2001 so would have placed it a LOT higher



Actually, the A.C. Clarke interview on the DVD beats the actual film in boringness by miles. Watched by me and another scifi nerd. Personally, I didn't find 2001 boring.

thisonehasalittlehat - 07 Dec 2017 11:26:08 (#14 of 104)

It's a bit long and they could cut the monkey stuff without harming anything.

YuleCunt - 07 Dec 2017 11:27:49 (#15 of 104)

Its a thing that you either like or you don't. Saying 'its boring' is as meaningful as looking at a Van Gogh and saying 'that's shit. It doesn't even look like the sky!'.

thisonehasalittlehat - 07 Dec 2017 11:32:08 (#16 of 104)

I'm not sure that's entirely true. There are criteria by which we evaluate the worth of cultural products. There is not universal agreement about those criteria, of course, but it's not as arbitrary as you imply.

Bonusy - 07 Dec 2017 11:32:47 (#17 of 104)

Can only comment on what I have seen, but nothing to fundamentally disagree with there:

2. The Blair Witch Project - Very dull. I was so happy when they all died as it meant it was over and I could get my lift back home

3. Star Wars Episode I: The Phantom Menace - dull

5. Transformers - awful, DNF

11. Batman and Robin - dullish

12. 2001: A Space Odyssey - good in parts, but far too long

YuleCunt - 07 Dec 2017 11:50:16 (#18 of 104)

I'm not sure that's entirely true. There are criteria by which we evaluate the worth of cultural products. There is not universal agreement about those criteria, of course, but it's not as arbitrary as you imply.

I'm not saying its arbitrary. I think you can make a fair case that a film like Transformers or Star Wars I is *objectively* rubbish - which is to say, a failure on its own terms*. But 2001 or Brokeback are in a different category. Its fine to say they aren't your thing or you were bored by them, but in both cases they're an artistic statement that either engages you or doesn't. Viewers only have to be *marginally* educated about movies to know that putting those two films in a 'most boring' list is moronic. But, we are where we are.

* on its own terms, disregarding the 'making a lot of money' criterion, by which they were both massively successful, of course.

Bonusy - 07 Dec 2017 11:59:31 (#19 of 104)

Viewers only have to be *marginally* educated about movies to know that putting those two films in a 'most boring' list is moronic

Why is having a negative opinion on something "moronic" just because some other people believe it has artistic merit?

CaptainBlack - 07 Dec 2017 12:03:53 (#20 of 104)

'There Will Be Blood'. Two hours of Daniel Day Lewis's Oscar baiting and zero plot development set to atonal music from someone out of Radiohead. Then it ends with "I drink your milkshake" to much bafflement. It's like the Family Guy episode that attempts to win an Emmy.

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