A thread to celebrate our minor ailments and indispositions and get advice on their treatment, based on anecdotal evidence, wot-I-reckonry and other internet wrongmo opinion.
I just got paint on my leg and have ripped out several hairs while trying to remove it. Is there a doctor in the thread who can prescribe a remedy?
Oh. I hoped this would be about this Ill, a lovely part of France it is in:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ill_(France)
is disappointed now.
Cellulose thinners and cotton wool. Don't spill it on the car.
That does look lovely, wickel. Sorry you were disappointed, and thank you for posting the link anyway.
What if invisible spiders are farming beneath my bristly white beard, seems to be a kind of soreness, and a radishness..
Your chin is turning in to a radish? You probably need to put a dressing on it.
They're probably face mites, everybody has them:
http://www.cvltnation.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/enhanced-buzz-wide-19324-1364932208-17.jpg
Your chin is an ECOSYSTEM.
Drink the vodka - it works wonders for your eyesight.
I have strawberries growing out of a certain orifice. The chemist suggested I get some cream.
I wouldn't waste good vodka testing that out that claim, Fender.
I don't think there's anything you can do about those floating thingies. They sometimes shrink or disappear spontaneously and they're harmless anyway.
What can be better than a minor illness? You withdraw to the bedroom, either to get back into bed or to lie on the bed. Half-light entering through partially drawn curtains. The reassuring murmur of daytime Radio 4. The workaday world goes on outside, but here within the sanctum time is your own and your mind can wander.
To be serious for a moment, apparently a sudden increase in floaters is a cause for concern and you should see an optician quickly in case of retinal detachment.
It's back to some of the best times in childhood, Slasher.
The reassuring murmur of daytime Radio 4.
I cannot remember the last time I turned the radio on.
Do ya remember the last thing you heard on the radio...maybe a Verdi opera...or a sputtering hum.
I was sharpening a big knife prior to slicing some pork belly yesterday.
For some inexplicable reason, I held the sharpener the wrong way round and as I vigorously sharpened the knife it inevitable slid off and sliced my finger to the bone.
I rushed to the bathroom, splashed my finger with betadine and wrapped it in a huge plaster. It's a funny shade of purple today.